Mike's amazing mid-May movie review:

Okay, so I went to see the Matrix Reloaded on Sunday. And no, I'll refrain from making the lame "They mean Matrix Overloaded" joke that every critic on the PLANET seems to have made. Let me start with a confession: unlike most people, I was not that struck with the first film. Its smorgasbord offering of pseudo-intelligent, profundity and theology was like listening to that guy in high school who'd read one philosophy book (either Kierkegaard or Nietzsche) and sat in the lunchroom dispensing wisdom like Pez - tiny tablets without any real substance. But with guns, lots of guns.

Visually, the second film, like the first, was quite impressive; in fact, it was a little over-impressive. The opening sequence was so utterly CG'd, and so utterly logic defying, that I really didn't know what to expect from the much-hyped fights. Thankfully, with the painful exception of the Neo vs. 100 Smiths, most of the fights were cool. The 100 Smiths battle, which I have heard many people praise as the future of film fighting, was like watching a video game that some else was playing. It's like I didn't even have to be there. With all the other fights relying on intricate wirework and the actors doing their own marital arts, why do I want to see a computer generated Keanu Reeves beat up a bunch of computer generated Hugo Weavings? Why do I care?

But perhaps the most confusing scenes in a picture wrought with Keymasters, Ghost Twins, omnipotent beings were the church meeting/orgy in Zion and Neo's meeting with the Architect.

The overlong church meeting, with "prayers" to no one in particular and a lot of hot, sweaty semi-naked people gyrating around, seemed grossly out of place. When they started dancing, I thought to myself, "Oh, they're Pentecostal." Then I thought, "Are all Pentecostals this SEXY?"

Where were the old and sick looking people who offered Neo and Trinity gifts? Are only the young and pretty allowed to go to church in Zion? Do they worship St. Nelly and sing his familiar hymn, "It's getting hot in here, Lord. So take off all your clothes, Lord." This was just some teenage masturbatory fantasy, not something that added to the plot of the film I was watching. Pointless and stupid!

Also pointless and stupid was Neo's conversation with the Architect. This is where the film should have ended. But, no, the Wachowski Brothers needed to drag this story out into another film. So instead of answers, we get more questions. Personally, I was hoping to find George Lucas at the heart of the Matrix.

Worse than needlessly dragging this film out, was the ridiculousness of the Architect's language. It was like a first-year University student who has discovered the "Thesaurus" function in his word-processing program. Was his speech supposed to be the most convoluted piece of nonsense? Or was this a clever ploy to get all the geeks back to watch this film one more time in a futile attempt to understand this gibber-ish? This was the point in the film where I largely tuned out: multiple Matrixes (what's the plural?), multiple Neos, multiple crap. I can't wait to find out in the next film that Zion and its inhabitants are all part of a much larger Matrix. Boy, won't that be fun!

Finally, a Monday Mission that speaks to me...

1. This seems to be the year for movie sequels (Terminator 3, Matrix Reloaded, 2 Fast 2 Furious, LOTR: The Return of the King, etc.). Is there a movie you would like to see Hollywood make a sequel to?

No. Well, maybe Lethal Weapon... what are we up to? 7? 8? That movie NEVER gets old.


2. What movie sequel do you think should never have been made?

Exorcist 2, any of the Jaws films and the new batch of Star Wars films. BOO!!!!


3. Are there any books (comic, novel, etc.) that you would like to see made into a movie? Who should star in it?

Oh, of course. A new Lone Wolf and Cub series would be great. I always want to see Toshiro Mifune play the lead, but, alas, he's gone. Can't think of another Japenese actor, currently working, with the fericiousness and compassion needed for the role. Also, I have been a huge fan of films made from lesser known comic over the past few years - Ghost World, Road to Perdition, even From Hell. Any serious underground comics would be great.

4. When was the last time the you got a shot at the Doctor's office? Do you prefer them in the arm or your backside? Or would you rather just take a prescription?

What does this have to do with movies? I haven't had a needle in a while. I prefer my arm though.

5. Do you make friends easier in "Real Life" or online or is it about the same? Do you have closer friendships in "Real Life" or online? Why do you think that is? Are you ok with that or would you like to make a change?

Real Life, and I like that you put it in quotation marks.

6. When you first got your drivers license how did you feel ? Did you get it on the first try, second, third, more than that ? Do you have a license ? If no, do you plan to get one ? Why or why not ?

I don't remember feelings overly excited. I'm not a huge fan of driving, but I got my license on the first try, without much drama.

-byRebecca



7. Have you ever had your tonsils removed? Did you ever come close? Tell me about that.

No, no. ... NO!

BONUS: Who's that girl?

Where?

Today's comment question: How do you prefer to have your Ice Cream served? Cone (sugar, cake, waffle), cup, or something else?

In my hand.

Another Friday Five... and actually on Friday!

1. Name one song you hate to admit you like.
The Humpety Dance by Digital Underground.

2. Name two songs that always make you cry.
I can't think of any song that makes me cry, so I'll go with the two songs that make me feel the saddest: All I Want is You by U2; and She by Elvis Costello

3. Name three songs that turn you on.
Let's Get it On, Marvin Gaye (like everyone else); Red Red Wine, UB40;... can't think of another one.Maybe Lay, Lady, Lay by Dylan.

4. Name four songs that always make you feel good.
White Light, White Heat by Velvet Underground; My and Julio Down by the Schoolyard, Paul Simon; I Fought the Law, The Clash; Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders From Mars, David Bowie.

5. Name five songs you couldn't ever do without.
Using only songs from previous questions...
Let's Get it On, I Fought the Law, She, Me and Julio, and White Light, or at least something by the VU.

So I'm a little apprehnsive about my upcoming birthday. I don't like to think about getting "older". See, I'm coming really close to that magic age, 30; the age young people are supposed to stop trusting you. It seems like such a milestone birthday. I am 30!, sounds more like a statement of being than an indication of age.

A Friday Five...

1. What was the first band you saw in concert?
Actually, it was Philosopher Kings/Great Big Sea/Spirit of the West in my first year of University. I wasn't a big concert guy. Though one time, in high school, a friend of mine tried to get me to go and see Henry Rollins... I was scared.

2. Who is your favorite artist/band now?
Miles Davis

3. What's your favorite song?
I don't think I have just one; I like a lot of different songs for different reasons. Some of my current favourites are "I Don't Like Mondays" Boomtown Rats; Marvin Gaye's "Let's Get it On; and "Cold Blooded Old Times" by Smog.

4. If you could play any instrument, what would it be?
Guitar.

5. If you could meet any musical icon (past or present), who would it be and why?
Miles... why wouldn't you want to meet Miles. The man was a musical genius!

Thought I'd add a little bit of colour to The Not Very Exciting World of Mike. Perhaps my readers (both of them?) will dig the new look. Must keep the peeps happy.

Over the summer I hope to write more entries here. I won't go so far as to "vow" to write more, 'cause more likely than not, it's not gonna happen. Why lie? I intend to write more though. So take comfort in that.

I saw Adaptation over the weekend and I must say, this was one of the most interesting, inventive films out there. As someone deeply connected to both literature and film, I'm often stuck by the problem of adapting novels or short stories into film. Most people give the obligatory "The book was better" response, but fail to take into consideration the very real problem of transferring something from one genre to another. Charlie Kaufman's script about his own inability to turn _The Orchid Thief_ into a film deals with this problem in an interesting and, not to be too sentimental about it, endearing way.
A lot of the older people in the audience I saw the film with were understandably confused by the caper-ish ending of the movie, but the statement is poignant nonetheless: people enter the movie theatre with expectations.

1. Who are your favorite cartoon characters?

Space Ghost and associates, and Nitz.

2. Have you yet reached the point where you feel like you are from a different generation than today's youth?

Oh yes. I feel old and out of touch. I reference television programs they've never even heard of.

3. What was the first Music Video that really impressed you? What made it so amazing?

I remember the first time I saw "Take on Me" by A-Ha. Brilliant piece of work; stands up with things made 10-15 years later.

4. Name a song and an era that comes to mind when you hear the word "Retro."

Boy in the Box, Corey Hart

5. How has your life been affected by HIV or AIDS?

Other than the usual list of dead celebs, it really hasn't, I'm happy to say.

6. Yesterday in the USA, we celebrated "Mothers Day," a day where we honor the mothers in our lives. If you were on a "special day" nominating committee, who or what would you recommend that we create a day in honor of?

Multi-national card and flower companies - wait a second...

7. Last week, we have several Tornadoes tore through many neighborhoods, destroying homes and devastating the lives of the residents. How would you feel if you lost every possession you owned? Or would it matter? How would you go on with your life?

I suppose I'd get on (I seem to have a remarkable ability to go on despite changes), but I don't like to think about losing my stuff.

BONUS: Do you remember the 21st night of September?

Oh, what a night... No.

Today's Comment Question: What part of your body would you like to have permanent hair removal performed on?

Fingers... I don't know.

001. What's your first name?: Michael
002. Whats your middle name?: William
003. Last Name?: Boyce
004. Nicknames: "Mike"; ocassionally "Boycie"
005. City: currently the Peg, but I've lived in Toronto, Oshawa and Waterloo
006. Birthdate: May 23, 1975
007. Chick or dude: totally dude
008. Zodiac Sign: Gemini - i haven't decided which twin I am though 
009. Siblings: sister, Allison
010. Pet(s): none
011. Eye Color: brown
012. Hair Color: brown 
013. Height: 5'11
014. What hand do you write with? right
015. Hair Length: pretty short
016. Do you bite your nails?: no
017. Do you think you are cute?: Oh heck no.
018. Do you think others think you're cute? doubtful, but I suppose anything's possible in this wacky world
020. Shoe Size: 91/2 - 10
021. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend: Nope
022. If so what is their name?: n.a.
023. Are you Happy?: No, I'm Mike. Seriously though, I guess I'm not unhappy.  
024. Did you send this to your crush?:  maybe
026. Where do you shop the most?: HMV; Chapters maybe
027. Do you think your fashion is cool?: i don't think anything about me is "cool"
028. Do you have any piercings? nope
029. What do you want pierced?: nothing
030. Do you do drugs?: no
031. Do you drink?: hardly ever
032. Who are your friends?: they know who they are (and who they are NOT)
033. Who is your best friend(s): i don't know if I have one
034: Who is your longest friend: I've never measured them
035: What kind of Shampoo and Conditioner do you use?: The kind in the shower
036. What are you most scared of?: being neglected
037. If you could go anywhere where would you go?: Key west  
038. How often do you cut your toenails?: Whenever they need it
039. What are you listening to right now?:  Ruby Tuesday by the Stones
040. Who are you talking to right now? myself
041. What time is it?: 10:27 am
042. Do you have your own phone line?:  Yes
043. What's your phone number: I'm not telling
044. What's your favorite shoe brand?: Docs  
046. What clothes do you sleep in: tshirt & pj pants
048. Who is the last person who called you? my boss
049. Where do you want to get married?: if I got married again, Vegas baby
050. If you could have one wish what would it be?: i don't think I'll share that
051. Who is the hottest guy/girl in your school: i don't know, there's lots of people here. I can't possibly have seen them all.
052. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be?:  I'd stop being so darn charming
053. How many people live in your house?: three, soon to be two
054. Who do you really hate?: I try not to hate people, but I do hate stupidity
056. Favorite Color(s): black
057. Favorite number(s):  2
058. Favorite Candy: Chocolate 
059. Favorite Band: Miles Davis Quintet  
060. Favorite Food: Spagetti
061. Food restaurant: Are there other types of resaurants? China Garden in Waterloo
062. Favorite Girl Names: Happy, Sleepy, Sneezy, Doc... wait, that's not right.
063. Favorite Boy Names: don't have one
064. Favorite animal: the wiley mongoose
065. Favorite Radio Stations: there's an internet Jazz Radio station I like
066. Favorite book: don't have one favourite: i love a lot of books
067. What perfume/cologne do you wear?: a playah's never reveal their stylin' secretz
068. Favorite summer activity?: sweating
072. Bungee Jumped?: nope
073. Sky dived?: nope
074. Went movie hopping?: Yes but they were bad movies
075. Ran from the cops?: Should have  
077. Tried to kill yourself?: Mmm... Actually yes, but that was a long time ago  
079. Skinny dipping?: are you offering?
080. Been In Love?: Sure, who hasn't?
081. Made yourself cry to get out of trouble?: All the time

***What do you think of when you hear these words:

082. Brown: poo 
083: Cow : Moo
084. Pig: bacon
085. Rubber:  boots
086. Science: voodoo 
087. Chair: table

***Which is worse:

088. Barfing on your date or date barfing on you: both are pretty bad, but I'd say it would be worse if I barfed on my date. If a girl barfed on a guy, and the guy handles it right, he is awesome.

089. Have your tonsils or your appendix removed?: tonsils, i guess

**Out of your friends, who is the:

090. Coolest: Dave
091. Weirdest:  Broomhead
092. Smartest: George
093. Happiest: Kim
094. Most Ditzy: There a few girls I know who might fit this. You know who you are.
095. Funniest: that's hard, cause people are different types of funny - Mel and Nikki together are a riot. Adam's funny (but he doesn't know it), Dave has an ability to make me laugh
096. Loudest: Shelley, Heather and Rachel
097 Quietest: Cheryl
098. Prettiest:: Ummmm, I won't say, but she really is the prettiest person I know, though she probably doesn't know that.
099. Who do you go to for advice?: No one, have you met my friends?
100. Who knows all your secrets?: ah, me?

***Do you know any:
101. Steve: Sent me this, bless him.
102: Mike: That's me... and about forty other people I know
103. Lindsay: a girl a year behind me at WLU, cute and sweet.
104. James: yes, a couple
105. Missy:  no... does anyone really know a Missy?
106. David:  Lots... and most of them are EVIL I TELLS YA! EEEEVVVIILLLLL.
107. Pat: Yep, a coworker who nods in sympathy
108. Roxette: Come on, Join the Joyride.

***Have you ever:
109. Eaten an entire gallon of ice cream?: sure
110. Caused a car accident?: does running into a fence count?  
111. Seen the ocean?: which one?

***This or that:
112. Night or Day?: Night
113. Chocolate Chip or Mint Chip?: chocolate
114. Ocean or lake?  ocean, in my experience, lake's smell
115. Chocolate or vanilla?: I'm starting to enjoy vanilla
116. Lion or Tiger?: tiger
117. Love or lust?: depends  but lust is easier
118. Silver or gold?: gold
119. Pencil or pen?: pen
120. Skirt or jeans?:  to wear? jeans.
121. Rose or tulip? : I don't care about flowers  

***Have you (in the last 48 hours)

122. Cried?:  no 
123. Blah Blah Blah: no  
124. Worn a skirt?: still no
125. Gone for a walk?: yes (Woohoo!!!)
126. Gone for a drive?: yes 
127. Been taken out for dinner?:  nope
128. Taken a test?: nope
129. Talked to an ex?: actually yes, well I got an email from her
131. Watched your favorite movie?: no, but I saw X2 and it was pretty cool
132. Gotten a present?: no
133. Missed someone?: sure
134. Hugged someone?:  no
135. Kissed someone?: no
136. Danced with someone?: nope
137. Had a nightmare?: nope
138. Fought with your parents?: no
139. What do you feel about the Ouiji board?:they're ouiji-tastic (actually they're crap)
140. Do you believe in yourself?: meh
141. Worst feeling in the world?:  when she doesn't talk to me
142. Best feeling in the world?:  hot bath
143. Are you for world peace?: meh  
144. Are you a health freak?:  nope
145. Do you have a crush on anyone?:  of course

***Final Questions:

147. Do you like filling these out?: oh yeah!!!
148: Who will respond to this?: Everyone, or else

Over the past few days, I have started writing here five or six times; sometimes quite a bit too. But something always makes me erase what I've written and start again. To get me into the writing mood, I think I'll start with a Friday five to see how it all works.

1. Would you consider yourself an organized person? Why or why not?

In certain things, I'm very organized. Unfortunately, I'm also chronicly lazy. So often, when things get "unorganized" I can't be bothered trying to fix them.

2. Do you keep some type of planner, organizer, calendar, etc. with you, and do you use it regularly?

I have one, yes; using it has been a continious struggle.

3. Would you say that your desk is organized right now?

Yes, yes I would.

4. Do you alphabetize CDs, books, and DVDs, or does it not matter?

I have, but my wife always wrecks it. DVDs are currently alphabetized within certain categories, but Criterion DVDs
are by issue number on the spine.

5. What's the hardest thing you've ever had to organize?
When I got married I alphabetized the combined CD collection and book collection. It was a nightmare (but so comforting).

A Friday Five on a Tuesday? This wildman doesn't care whose toes he steps on...

1. How many houses/apartments have you lived in throughout your life?
5, 6 if you count my dorm in first year university... i tend not to.

2. Which was your favorite and why?
My current place... it has all my stuff.

3. Do you find moving house more exciting or stressful? Why?
stressful No one has yet been able to prove to me that change is good.

4. What's more important, location or price?
Location

5. What features does your dream house have (pool, spa bath, big yard, etc.)?
Big tv, and the whole home theatre set up.

More films to catalogue. Talk to Her A+ - another masterpiece by one of the best filmmakers in the world. Autofocus C - disappointing bio-pic of Bob Crane. Imitation of Life B+/A- enjoyable Sirk film. Life of Brian A - Python's best. Va Savoir A - enthralling French drama. To Have and Have Not B+ - could have done witout the singing, but Bogart and Bacall are HOT!

Watched a few good fims this weekend. First, 24 Hour Party People. It's the story of Tony Wilson, a Brit TV personality who figures promiently into the history (or perhaps myth) of punk, post-punk, and rave music in Manchester. The film wonderfully blurs the line between fact and fiction by featuring (and mentioning) cameos by real figures (including Wilson himself) and blending documentary footage into the narrative. While I thought it ran a little long, the films functions as interesting a commentary on art and style as the post-modern, genre-defining music of the era.

Next, I finally brought home (or rather Rachel brought home for me) 8 Femmes, a film I've been anxious to see since I heard about it almost a year ago. Visually this film reminded me of the best films of Jacques Demy (Umbrellas and Young Girls in particular). There's a richness and fullness to the colours that seems almost hyper-real - an effect which adds to, and perhaps allows, the strange mixing of mystery and musical genres. The film has been compared to Altman's Gosford Park; like that film, 8 Femmes appears to be a murder mystery though the solving the murder is not nearly as exciting as discovering the secrets of the household. 8 Femmes adds the further layer of musical numbers which, although fun, speak to various themes and subplots. I personally found that 8 Femmes is more subtle in its use of the mystery genre than Gosford Park. In Altman's film the police inspector never comes close to figuring out the crime, indeed the characters remain largely in the dark. For the 8 Femmes, figuring out who killed Marcel is never far from their minds.

Feb 28 2003: Big Sleep (again)

Started The Way We Were but couldd't get more than twenty minutes in. Apparently the way they were was boring!

Have been reading a lot of Hemingway since returning from Florida. Seeing the man's house really got me thinking about how much I loved his writing. Finished The Son Also Rises in a day, read a handful of short stories; am currently a few chapters into To Have and Have Not.

In recent months I've had trouble remebering the plot points of movies I've seen in the past year or two. This is particularly upsetting as I've alwasy prided myself on a near-photographic memory when it comes to film. I can usually remeber whole sections of dialogue on a single viewing, but lately I find myself remembering slight, vague details but can't recall which film they occur in. It's annoying. One possible way to battle this problem is to keep better track of the films I've seen. Then I at least have a list from which to work with.

So here we go:

Feb 13 2003: 8 1/2
Feb 23 2003: Shanghai Knights

1. Has anyone ever told you that you needed to lose weight or change something about yourself physically? Who told you and what impact did it have on your life? Your perception of yourself?

Ocassionally I get comments about my weight, which I'm very senstive about. Whenever people use the word "fat" in regards to me I get all flustered. I'm not fat; I know that. It just bothers me.

2. Do enjoy the snow and cold weather?

No! I was in Florida last week and if it wasn't for my wife, I'd be there still!

3. Visualize the perfect winter evening. Are you alone or with someone? How does the evening start? How does it end, and everything in-between.
With someone. Starts with dinner, wine, a movie and then whatever.

4. I've noticed that people I work with, even no more than 6 feet away, would rather e-mail me a message than turn around and speak to me. Same goes for voice mail, I find I get more calls when I am away than when I am available to speak to someone. So many things that could be said face-to-face are now accomplished electronically. Do you think that technology has had allowed relationships and human interaction to become less personal? Is this a good thing?

In some ways technology has made communication easier - for example, it's much easier to write things than to say them face to face. I write people I might never talk to, and find it easier to talk about more person things. At the same time, because technology makes that easier, talking face to face has become harder. It's easier NOT to talk, but to write.

5. One thing I've always wanted to learn is how to juggle. I'm pretty good with my hands, so I am
sure I could do it. Yet, I've never made the commitment to sit down and learn how. Is there anything you've been meaning to learn, that you can learn, but haven't? (or maybe you have?)

Be a better person... (haven't had time)

6. On the other side of the coin, there is photography. As much as I'd like to, I will never be as great at it as others. And I am OK with that, still I wish I had the gifts that others have. What skills or talents have you wished that you possessed that you most likely never will? Are you content with that?

I don't know.

7. "AudioBlogs" are a twist on text blogs, where the blogger posts audio files instead of writing their entries. Not far behind the curve are VideoBlogs. While I've tinkered with Audio posts before, I think it excludes too many people and personally, I feel the written word has a deeper impact. What do you think of the concept of "AudioBlogs?" Would you like to hear the voice of your favorite bloggers occasionally? Would you rather listen to or read your favorite Blogs?

I don't know. It might be fun to listen/watch a blog, but there's something about reading a well written entry.

BONUS: How deep is your love?

Why? Do you want to go swimming in it?

Today's Comment Question: How many hours of sleep do you usually get each night?

As many as I can!

Why post original commentaries when the fan DEMAND the Monday Mission? Hang on, what fans?

1. In the states, every citizen is expected to perform their civic duty and serve on a jury at some point. This week, I am on jury duty. Have you ever had to serve on a jury?
No.

2. If you were to ever serve on a jury, would you be able to give someone the death penalty?
Maybe - it would depend on the circumstances

3. One thing that concerns me about jury duty is what my life would be like if I had to convict someone. I'd always be worried about some sort of retaliation from the convict, or their family. Has fear of negative consequences ever kept you from reporting a crime or voicing your opinion?
I think you watch too many movies. I don't think so... well, there was that Gambino double murder thing a few years back.

4. When it comes to convictions, I've never even been convicted of speeding (accued yes, but heh, never convicted). Have you ever been accused of or convicted for breaking any laws? What's the real story there?
No...

5. It looks like I will have a lot of time on my hands this week in the jury pool. I may get called, I may not. If not, I go back tomorrow. Rinse, wash, repeat. How would you pass the time if you had to sit and wait around from 8am-5pm for 5 days?
You get to hang out in a POOL? That rocks. I'd spend my time going off the diving board.

6. One thing I do like about this "civic duty" is that it will be at the downtown courthouse. I LOVE downtown. There is just so much life there. What part of your town is your favorite to visit? Why? What makes it so special?
I like the Exchange. It's old (the city passed a by-law a little while ago that prevents "newer" looking building or signs from going up). It's cool - except for all the bums begging for change.

7. I'm not that outgoing around strangers, so I doubt I will be meeting many new people this week. Do you have any problems striking up a conversation with someone you don't know? Have chance encounters with strangers ever led to interesting new relationships or opportunities?
I have trouble striking up conversations with people I do know. Every once and awhile I'll go outside my comfort zone and talk to strangers, but only on very special occasions.

BONUS: So if I tell you that you're really something baby, will you stay or will you go away ?
I will go... far, far away.

Today's Comment Question: What toppings do you like on your pizza?
ground beef, green peppers, extra cheese.

Alright, kiddies, Monday Mission Time!!!

1. Do you remember the first LP, 45, CD or CD single that you bought? Recreate the scene for me.
As a matter of fact, I do. The first LP I bought (as opposed to the ones my parents purchased FOR me) was Fat Boys Crushin'. I was about 12 or so and rap was just starting to become really popular. My friend Shawn and I hit the local mall - taking the bus by ourselves, another first for me - and each bought the record at Sam the Record Man.
The first CD I bought was probably Summertime by DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince - not nearly as cool as the Fat Boys.

2. What was the last CD or song that you actually paid money for?
Tenecious D. I have since sold it.

3. It is my personal opinion that "Munchos" and "Funions" are the most perfect snack food ever. What do you think is the best snack food ever?
Nachos. Lots and lots of nachos.

4. Comedian George Carlin once pointed we consider the things we like to keep around us to be our "stuff," whereas other people's stuff is just junk to us (ok, he used more colorful language, but you get the idea). What "stuff" do you have that someone else might just throw away if they were cleaning out your house?
Old Star wars toys, comics and sports cards. If it wasn't for my watchful eye, my wife would have thrown the whole lot out years ago.

5. Do you think it is wrong for people to rush to e-Bay and start selling Space Shuttle Columbia collectibles?
What do you mean by collectibles? Do you mean little pendants or key chains? Or a steamin' chunk of hull? Pendants and keychains, while tacky, aren't "wrong", but pieces of the wrechage would be questionable.

6. Does it bother you when President Bush speaks about God and invokes scripture quotations from the Bible during his speeches?
Yes, but the Bible says that even the Devil himself will quote Scripture to try to dup people.

7. I have a friend who think's she's being photographed in public restrooms. What paranoid delusion do you have?*
I think people are laughing at me.

Bonus: Can't you feel the weight of my stare?
Yes, and I've been meaning to speak to you about it.

Super-Fun Survey Time - a big thanks to my ever-loving sister who gave me this one which allowed me to wile away the hours at work!!!

1)Full name: Michael William Boyce, Esq. Well, okay. Not esq.

2) Single or taken: taken

3] sex : Yes please. Oh my, that joke NEVER gets old.

4) Birthday: May 23

5) Star Sign: Gemini, I believe.

7)Siblings: one sister (who stole question #6), on brother in law

8)Hair color: Brown

9)Eye color: Brown

10)Shoe size: 9

11) height: 5'11

R e l a t i o n s h i p s

1) Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: No

2) Did you send this to your crush?: I'm not sending it to ANYONE!

F a s h i o n S t u f f

1) Where is your favorite place to shop?: HMV, Chapters, Gap

2) Any tattoos or piercings: Nope

T h e E x t r a S t u f f

1) Do you do drugs?: No, I won't even take aspirin.

2) What kind of shampoo do you use?: The kind in the bathtub when I'm showering. I don't know.

3) What are you most scared of?: The number of questions missing from this survey

5) What car do you wish to have: the kind with a cd player

6) Who is the last person that called you?: called me? I don't remember.

7) Where do you want to get married?: Am married.

8) If you could change anything about yourself, what would it be?: I'm too damn nice.

9) What was your first car?: 1986 Chevette - Clearisol Brown. Oh Seymore!

F a v o r i t e s

2) Number: The missing ones.

3) Food: Nachos, Spagetti

4) Boys name: Cedric

5) Girls name: Don't have one.

6) Subjects in school?: english and history

7) Animal?: dogs, I guess

8) Drink: diet pepsi

9) Movie: Casablanca

10)Celebrity: Don't really have one.

11)Sport: Tackle football

12) Sport to watch?: Football

H a v e Y o u E v e r

1) Given anyone a bath?: Just me.

2) Smoked?: Yup

3) Bungee jumped?: No but I want to

4) Broken the law?: Of course, the law of the jungle.

5) Made yourself throw-up?: I think so.

6) Gone skinny-dipping?: No

7) Been in love?: Mmmm, I guess

8) Done the Deed: What deed? Is that a euphemism?

F i r s t T h i n g T h a t C o m e s T o M i n d

1) Red: blood

2) cow: moo

3) Greenland: big

F i n a l Q u e s t i o n s

1) Do you like filling these out?: So much it's scary

2) Gold or Silver?: Gold, it'd worth more

3) favortie weapon of choice in a fight: I prefer a mid-sized pool cue wrapped in barbed wire and set on fire, or a steel folding chair.

In pathetic world news, some couple in the states got married in the Walmart store they both met and work in. Sadest part of all is they didn't even close the store. It took place at 11 o'clock in the morning, and customers/co-workers made up most of the congregation. Gee, think maybe these two loverbirds don't have many friends? Maybe it's strangely fitting. Perhaps the marriage relationship will be every bit as crappy and second rate as the stuff Walmart sells. Annulments, aisle 6.

1. Do you care for poetry? Do you have a favorite poem? Care to share some of it?
Yes, I like poetry. Don't have a particular favourite, but am currently reading (and greatly enjoying) the poetry of Paublo Neruda.

2. What does it take to "rock your world?"
I dunno. Don't know many people who would want to "rock" my "world".

3. Have you ever done anything that landed you in financial trouble? Has somebody else's action ever caused you financial ruin? What happened?
Other than the massive student loans I've acquired over the years, not really.

4. Take a stroll down memory lane. There is a song, that every time you hear it, you think of this one person. What's the song, who is the person, and what memories does it conjure up?

"End of the Road" Boyz to Men; Sandy; high school dances and infatuations.

5. I've never cared for football, it was never on in the house growing up and I never developed a "taste" for it. But I've always felt like I "should" enjoy it, that I was deficient in some way because I never get excited about things like the Super Bowl (except for the commercials). Are there any occasions when you feel like you are missing out on something that everyone else seems to enjoy?

Most sports and reality television shows. I mean what's the freakin' deal with American Idol and Survivor? These shows are nothing more than clear illustrations that society is corupt, deceitful and downright selfish.

6. A few of the phrases that get under my skin are "take it to the next level" (which was used when I was told why I was being replaced at Fox by someone who could do that) and "you just don't get it" (always popular in relationship fights). What phrases "push your buttons" and why?
"Is that all today?' or any variation of that phrase used by store employees to upsell things I don't want. "And would you like some popcorn/ a t-shirt/ a sharpie?" Like I'm such an idoit that I go that the check out counter forgetting what it is I really need. If I wanted popcorn/ a t-shirt/ a sharpie I would have brought it WITH ME to the counter.

7. Do you believe in life after death? What do you believe happens when our time is up?*
Yes. Good stuff.

BONUS: Everybody's talking all this stuff about me why don't they just let me live?
Everybody's talkin' at me.They can't hear a word I'm saying.

Okay, so here I sit, alone in my new office at St John's College. Everything's in boxes and my co-workers are all out buying new things for their offices. Apparently the plan is that THEY get new stuff and I'm expected to cull what I can use from the stuff they no longer want. Wonderful. I'm supposed to be working but I think I have a good excuse for not. Someone's hanging pictures in the hall and because this old building is likely full of asbestos, they have to use this special vacuum whenever they drill into the wall. It's loud and makes concentrating difficult.
What else is new in my wacky little life? Well I got an email from an old high school friend. He was on his way to Winnipeg to teach a seminar and wanted to hook up. Though I was a little nervous about it, I went and had a great time. We're going to try to hang out later today, after he's done teaching and I'm done teaching. He's teaching managers about the importance of customer service; I'm teaching uninterested first years about Frankenstein. I'm sure we'll have plenty to talk about.
I think my intial fear was that I'm quite different then I was in highschool and my interests were so different from my friends to begin with, now I'm afraid it would be like talking in different languages. Amazingly it was really fun to see Mike and talk, and not just about old times. Of course a lot of conversation was "whatever happened to..." stuff, but we did manage to relate on a more personal level, and I think, were we living within a reasonable distance, Mike and I would still hang out.
In other news, there is still one person in my life I simply don't know what to do with. Half the time (well, less now) she's open with me, sharing things about her life, but lately even getting a "hello" is an accomplishment. What brought about this change? Search me. It's stuff liek this that causes my anti-social tendencies to flare up.
I've been trying to write as well. And that seems to be going as well as everything else in my life. I have the ideas, I know where I want the story to go, but when I sit down nothing comes out. I suppose I just have to keep at it. I think this is a publishable book, if I can ever get it finished. I just have to believe in myself and all that malarkey.

1. Friday I wrote about "People I Can Do Without." How about adding to the list with a few people you can live without?
People who, for whatever reason, act superior or like they can do without you. And Howie Mandel.

2. Have you ever felt like someone truly respected you? What does being respected mean to you personally?
Truly respected me? No, I usually feel as if people are just barely tolerating me. Being respected, at its simplest level, is being treated the way others would like you to treat them.

3. In (past or current) relationships, what is the "one thing" your partner would change about you if they could?
My "not knowing".

4. Have you ever tried to change who you are to please someone? How did that turn out?
Always. Results have varied.

5. Do you believe in love at first sight? Can it really happen?*
No and no.

BONUS: What will I do if you say we're through?
A Jig.

Today's Comment Question: Where is your "tickle spot?"
Like I'm gonna tell you that. Come on!

I can'r really bring myself to write anything on this site but the answers to silly Monday Missions. Perhaps, once I'm done moving my office at the end of he week, I'll be in more of a writing mood. Til then, here's a MM:

1. Have you ever bought something you were so excited about and found out later that it didn't work? Were you able to return it? How did it go?
I can't recall a specific instance of this, but I'm sure it's happened. I guess I returned it without hassle or else I would have a clearer memory of it.

2. I have a Palm (Pilot) for my date book and such, but have been thinking of jumping to the PocketPC world at some point. Do you have a PDA (personal digital assistant)? What kind, and how did you decide? What do you like about it? If you don't own one, do you want one or do you do better without such gadgets?
No. As I have enough trouble remembering to write things down in my $15 dayplanner, I can't really justify spending a few hundred dollars for something that will gather dusk.

3. What illness do you wind up catching more than any other?
Rabies.

4. Do you like going to see the Doctor (any type)?
A guy with cold hands who wants to drop your pants - does anyone LIKE this?

5. How about the Dentist? Do you like going? Do you go in every 6 months for a check-up?
I've had more needles for the dentist than the doctor - that effects the psyche. I don't like the dentist very much at all. I go every six months though.

6. Are you a "Dog Person" or a "Cat Person?" Do you think a person's choice tells you something about
their personality?
I' m a whatever animal doesn't bite/scratch/pee on me. If this does say something about your personality, I'd suggest getting a new personality.

7. I've mentioned before how me and a buddy of mine have just let our friendship lapse. There was no disagreement, but we've hit that point where we have nothing in common anymore. My life has progressed and he is still living in 1992. Have you ever had a friendship that just seems to have run its course? Where there is just nothing there anymore? What finally happened?
Your friend still lives in 1992? Tell him not to put money on the Bills!!! And can he pick me up a leather tie?

BONUS: Do you want to see me beggin' baby? Can't you give me just one more day?
Who the %*^ are you talkin' to, Promoguy? 

Today's Comment Question: Wanna get together after work and run around? Any ideas on what to do?
After walk you want to run? I can think of a million better things to do.

More Monday Mission fun... Yeah, so it's a couple of days late; sue me!!!

1. What is one of your favorite things to wear?
Pants. I could sing the praises of pants.

2. Did you get any "dud" gifts for the holidays? Will you return them?
Nope and nope.

3. Let's do a few "Best of 2002" thoughts. What was the best movie of 2002? Why did you pick that one?
I don't know. If we're talking about films MADE in 2002: Punch Drunk Love or Far From Heaven were excellent. I really enjoyed The Two Towers as well. For films I saw for the first time in 2002, easily The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp - it did the impossible; lived up to my great expectations.

4. What world event of 2002 made an impact on you?
I'm sorry, there were world events?

5. What personal event of 2002 was the most memorable?
Teaching my own class. Seeing my first real play staged.

6. Is there anything in 2002 (decisions, relationships, purchases, etc.) that, looking back, you would have done differently?
I would do EVERYTHING different.

7. Shine up your magic crystal ball and look into the future. What do you think will happen in your life in 2003? Or, what would you like to happen in 2003?
Will happen: misery
Would like to happen: not so much misery

BONUS: Was it somethin' I said or somethin' I did, did my words not come out right?
 Oh no. It's my fault. It's me.

Today's Comment Question: What are some of your favorite song lyrics at the moment?
"You may laugh, but pretty girls look right through me" - simple yet so profound

1. Which Blog post of yours was one of your favorites of 2002?
I'm not that thrilled with anything I do.

2. Were there any "old acquaintances" that should be forgot this year?
Yes, apparently me. I continue to be ignored one minute, talke up to the next.

3. Did you finish what you started last week?
I don't know. What was I working on last week?

4. Will you be doing anything to celebrate "New Year's Eve?" Any traditional food or drinks you associate with "New Year's?"
Going to a "party" - well, more a gathering. No.

5. What was the coolest present you got this year?
The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp - a film I've been trying to see for EVER!!!!

6. The day after Christmas, around 3pm, I drove by a car where the driver and his passenger were each drinking a beer; there was no mistake about it. I was shocked, because I'd never seen anyone actually do this. And wasn't sure what I should do about it. What would you do in the same situation?

Run into them. No matter what, they'll be charged.

7. Have you ever driven a car while drinking alcohol? Ever driven drunk or known anyone who has? How'd that turn out?
I haven't driven while drinking, nor have I driven under the influence. I've driven a little too soon after being under the influence, which wasn't smart. I have been in the car with drivers who I know have had a little too much to drink. Agai, not proud of this.

Bonus: Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
What are things unless they're complicated, sk8ter boi?

Today's Comment Question: How ya like me now?

Did I even like you before?

Well, in an attempt to save myself from an impending nervous breakdown (more on that in a bit) I WAS going to fill out a Monday Mission. However, as has been fairly representative of my existence these days, there isn't one. So instead I'll just type meaningless entries to whoever reads this thing. Does anyone read this? I know, if you come up to me and say "Sweaters, always sweaters" I'll buy you a coke.
So I'm "involved" in my church annual Christmas drama. I purposely use the word "involved" because of its associations with dating -
both are maddening/fun/infuriating/egobuilding/egodestroying. Honestly, I'm more than "involved" - I've done a TON of work on it. I wrote it, cast half the actors, co-directed, designed and helped build the sets; I worked out the lights and have been the one most people have come to with complaints and "suggestions" for next year. I won't get into the whole shabang here (never know who's lurking around) but I don't think I'll be doing one of these again. Though, truth be told, I'm quite proud of the perfomances. I wouldn't trade the people I asked to be in it for anything. But then again I did it all for "she" - not the wisest of moves, but nevertheless. If she's happy with it, how can I be otherwise?
Anyway, happy holidays to all and to all a good night!

Okay, so it's the "holiday season"... bah humbug. But, in keeping with the season, I'll answer the Christmas edition of the Monday mission.

1. So, what do you want for Christmas this year that you probably won't get?

Besides the more ethereal "world peace," "a freakin' clue" answers, I'll stick to the concrete: a new widescreen television and a library of DVDs.

2. What do you know you will be receiving for Christmas this year?

Sweaters, always sweaters

3. If you had the means to do so, what presents would you get some of your
fellow bloggers? Be specific, it's more fun that way!

The only other Blogger I know or even read is Chris: if I could, I'd fly him and his lovely wife to Winnipeg for a visit.

4. Do you support any organizations that provide for the less fortunate during the holidays? Or do any volunteer work?

I used to but not so much any more.

5. Each year about this time, I notice Church attendance seems to spike, then drops off sharply after Christmas. It tickles me that these folks think they are pulling a fast one on the Big Guy. What is the most recent thing guilt has motivated you to do?

Everything I do is motivated by guilt.

6. According to the commercials, the only way to truly tell someone you love them on Christmas day is to let them "Unwrap a Jaguar" automobile. Are there any examples of excessive commercialism and/or blatant disregard for the "Christmas Spirit" that really get under your skin?

Yes.


7. I remember a song where the singers wished they could teach the world to sing, in perfect harmony. What would you like to teach the world?

I don't know, some sort of craft I suppose.

BONUS: Do they know it's Christmas time at all?

Probably, but do you think they care?


Today's comment question: What is your favorite holiday beverage?

Egg nog, lots of it!!! MMmmmmm... it's almost wort the trouble of the holidays to get a frothy cup of nog!!!

1. Do you get sick very often? What illness do you find that you've had most frequently?
I don't get sick that often but when I do it's more an unspecified "sick" feeling than an actual illness like the flu.

2. I know a man who flat out refuses to go to the Doctor's office. You'd need an ambulance to get him near a hospital. Not me, I'd rather go as soon as I feel sick so I can get better. Do you mind going to see the Doctor when you get sick? Do you know anyone who just refuses to go to a Doctor when they get ill? Any idea why they are like that?

Doctors are horrible, evil people who only ever give you "anitbiotics" anyway. Seriously, you could be bleeding from the eyes and what does the doctor say: "I'll put you on antibiotics for a week and, if that doesn't work, we'll get you something stronger. Don't like doctors; don't trust medicine.

3. How about visiting the Dentist? Do you go get a check-up every 6 months? Or do you dread going?

I go but hate it.

4. I've heard about a diet pill called "Thermolift" that allegedly gives you quite an energy rush (oh boy mentioning this will surelybring us all a ton of Google hits won't it?). Although I've thought about getting some of these pill for the times I need a boost, I'm probably not going to take the plunge. Have you ever taken any diet pills, energy pills or energy drinks? How did they make you feel? Do you still take them? How come?

No.

5. Have you heard about "Gastric Bypass" surgery that many celebrities are doing to loose weight? (The process reduces the size of your stomach to facilitate weight loss) What are your thoughts on this procedure? Would you ever consider it? How would you feel if a relative were to decide to undergo the procedure?

Yes I've heard of it. No I wouldn't try it.

6. What do you think the opposite sex needs to experience to fully understand what it is like to be your gender?

A penis.

7. And to lighten things up a bit before we go...What's the most worthless gadget, infomercial item or "looked like a bargain" item you have ever purchased or owned?

the clapper. Clap off.

BONUS: Why can't every day be like Christmas?
What, screaming, arguing, stuff you don't like or want, crying, pretending to be happy. Isn't every day like Christmas?

Today's Comment Question: I have a new, faster computer and I am ready run some new programs and have fun. What do you like to do (games, programs, etc.) on your computer for entertainment? I used to play SIms a lot but then I married my best most successful Sim off and he fell to pieces (rather prophetic, don't you think?) I mostly play spider solitare. That's fun.

Monday Mission Time!

1. Suppose God grants you one miracle. Consider the world in which we live. Consider your life and family. What would you request for this miracle? Are you sure that is the best way to use it? You only get one.

Well, if the ol' I'd want a million miracles doesn't work, I guess I'd ask for something like world peace. Either that or to be uncontrollably attractive to women. It's a coin toss.

2. I believe that prayers do get answered, but I realize not everyone agrees. Have you ever had an experience where you truly believe your prayer was answered? If you don't believe in such things, how come? What is your philosophy on prayer?

Yes I have. I'm not telling.

3. Have you ever lost a pet? That is, have you ever had a pet get loose, run away or be stolen? Did you get it back? How did the loss impact your life?

No I haven't.

4. Getting together with family at the holidays is great, I just love it. Most of all I love the food. What is your favorite holiday food?

Pumpkin pie, though I'm quickly being converted to cream horns!

5. One thing I've noticed about the holidays is that no one makes Pumpkin Pie like my Grandmother. She has totally spoiled me on her recipe, I just don't like the taste of anyone else's Pumpkin Pie. Are there are dishes or desserts that someone in your family fixes better than anyone else?

Nope.

6. Since I have no brothers or sisters, I am always wondering what it would have been like. Now that I am older, it kinda stinks that I will never be an Uncle. Do you have any siblings with children? How does it make you feel to be an Aunt or an Uncle? If not, would you like to be have nieces and nephews? Would you make a good relative to them?

My sister has no children, but swears she'll have 12 one day. That is a day I'm not looking forward to.

7. I am putting together a CD of great holiday music. Do you have any suggestions of what songs (title/artist) I should include?

Fairytale of New York, the Pogues - what better song to sum up the bleakness of the season
Peace on Earth, Bing and Bowie -weird combination of voices, but a phenomenal song

BONUS: How would you feel knowin' prejudice was obsolete and all mankind danced to the same beat?

Just cause they dance don't mean they got rhythm.

Today's Comment Question: Did you see Titanic? Did Rose die at the end or was she just sleeping? I say she was just asleep and dreaming.

She's dead. I killed her.

Just giving the people what they want... surveys!

1. WHAT TIME IS IT? 5:16

2. NAME AS IT APPEARS ON YOUR BIRTH CERTIFICATE: Michael William Boyce

3. NICKNAME(S): none

4. PARENTS NAMES: Bill and Roberta Boyce

5. NUMBER OF CANDLES THAT APPEARED ON YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY CAKE: 27

6. DATE THAT YOU REGULARLY BLOW THEM OUT: May 23

7. PETS: None

9. HAIR COLOR: brown

10. FAVORITE BAND(s) : Talking Heads, Velvet Underground

11. FAVORITE CANDY BAR: Crispie Crunch or Wunderbar

12. PARASAILING? What about it?

13. MOST BEAUTIFUL PLACE YOU HAVE EVER VISITED: PEI

14. DO YOU KNOW ANY SWEAR WORDS IN ANY OTHER LANGUAGES? I used to know some russian ones

15. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN HYPNOTIZED? nope

16. FAVORITE FOOD: spagetti

17. BEEN TO AFRICA? No but I've been to me (thanks Chris)

18. BEEN TOILET PAPERING?? Yep

19. LOVED SOMEBODY SO MUCH IT MADE YOU CRY? Shut up!

20. BEEN IN A CAR ACCIDENT? yep though I wasn't driving

21. CRUTONS OR BACON BITS? Croutons are just dried up chunks of moldy bread - gross. Gimme bacon!

22. SPRITE OR 7-UP? Doesn't matter

23. FAVORITE MOVIE(S): of all time Casablanca; Royal Tenebaums, Lady Vanishes, Sanjuro, In the Mood for Love

24. Favorite holiday? Whatever one I get presents or candy on.

25. Favorite day of the week: Tomorrow

26. Favorite word or phrase: whatever

27. Favorite Toothpaste: whatever's by the sink

28. Favorite Restaurant: Olive Garden - so much salad!

29. Favorite Flowers: wilted ones

30. Favorite Drink: diet pepsi

31. Favorite sports to watch: wrestling, though I'm starting to like football too

32. Preferred type of ice cream? mint chocolate chop or candy cane! MMmmmm

33. Favorite Sesame Street Character: Oscar the freakin' Grouch - he's kind of a guru

34. Favorite colors? Shut up!

35. Favorite Fast Food Restaurant: Whatever's closest

36. When was your last hospital visit? Visiting kim in the summer. Hospitals smell funny and it's best not to go anywhere near them.

37. If money was no object, what car would you buy: One that goes and has a cd player

38. How many times did you fail your driver's test: Never

39. Who is the last person you got email from before this? Someone trying to sell me herbal Viagara

40. Have you ever been convicted of a crime? Not lately

41. Which single store would you choose to max out your credit card? HMV

42. What do you do most often when you are bored? MSN; curl up in the fetal position and cry

43. Name the person that you are friends with that lives the farthest: depends on what you mean by friend - I guess England

44. Most annoying thing people ask me: "Are you sure?"

45. Bedtime: whenever

48. Favorite all time TV shows: Night Court, Mr. Show, Monty Python, Fawlty Towers, Blackadder

49. Last person(s) you went out to dinner with: Rachel

50. Last Movie you saw? Punch Drunk Love

51. What's in your CD player right now? Built to Spill - they're awesome

52. What is your favorite Smell: fresh bread

53. What book is by your bed? V by Thomas Pynchon and Beautiful Losers by L.C.

54. Most uncommon job you have ever had? I don't know

55. What career you would choose if you could do anything you wanted and make lots of money too? Does Master of the Universe count as job? If so, then that. Otherwise, I'd want to be a writer/director/actor.

56. Make one wish for the thing you would want most: My dreams to come true.

1. Have you ever made a wish that came true?

Probably, but not a good wish (world domination, winning the lottery etc). I get "I wish I could find a parking spot" wishes granted.

2. How about any wishes that you are happy never came true?

Yes (Mike stops talking for fear of incrimination).

3. Do you like who you are? Are you the person you hoped you would become?

I don't love myself all the time, but than I would think that only really shallow people would. I always imagined I would be taller.

4. I recently found some job applications that I never turned in. Back in 1986 I intended to apply at "County Seat" and "Chess King" but got an offer from Penny's (where I worked all through college). It was a good thing, since only one of the three is still around. Have you ever applied for positions, or had any interviews, where you later are glad you never got the job?

Well, one time I applied at Sears and they asked me al these stupid "do you ever get angry" type questions, which I totally lied about. They called me back, but I already landed another job. Good thing cause, in retail, it wouldn't have taken longer before they realized how angry I can get (jk).

5. While on the topic of career opportunities, what was your very first "real" job? What job was the most embarrassing?

First real was "jack-of-all-trades" at a Salvation Army thrift store. I stayed for over six years. I don't think I've had an embarrassing job. Though not all the jobs I've been asked to do at work have been enjoyable.

6. Speaking of news, have you had your 15 minutes of fame yet? Such as being in the newspaper, on television, linked on a high-profile site or otherwise caught in the spotlight of the media?

No.

7. In the USA, many of us will celebrate Thanksgiving this week. Do you celebrate Thanksgiving (or something like it)? Do you enjoy getting together will your extended family for these types of celebrations?

I celebrate Thanksgiving in October, when you're supposed to. I enjoy getting together with friends and family for short, controlled lengths of time - 2-3 hours at the most. After my turkey I need a nap.

BONUS: Where is the tenderness?

I got your tenderness right here.

Stop the world, I want to get off. Just when I think I've seen everything, something comes along and shakes my beliefs, my faith, my understanding of the universe to the core. I saw an Adam Sandler film I liked - check that, loved.
I went in to _Punch Drunk Love_ with an ear full of positive reviews and glowing praise, but deep in side I keept thinking "These people can't be right. They must be talking about another movie." As I sat there, alone in the darkness, I found myself riveted to the screen. It wasn't just the story; it wasn't just the look of the film; I have to admit that it was Sandler himself. What P.T. Anderson has done with _PunchDrunk Love_ is nothing short of a miracle. He takes a "Sandler" type character, Barry Egan, a socially awkward young man with some violent tendencies, and places him in the real world and in real situations. Rather than laugh at the awkwardness of Barry, we connect emotionally with him - feeling for him as Anderson exposes, layer by layer, the circumstances that have made this guy the way he is.
The only brother in a family with 7 sisters, Barry is coddled, teased, harassed and tormented by his sisters. They call his work constantly, ignoring his claims of being with clients; they try to fix him up with women and then proceed to berate and belittle him. Barry has no one he can turn to until one of his sisters introduces him to Len (Emily Watson), whom he falls in love with.
Watching Egan try to fit in might remind one of a half sozen of Sandler's other comdies, but this one is different. Egan isn't the butt of the joke - there is no joke. Acceptance doesn't come with winning a football game or winning a golf game, it comes from loving and being loved

Well, today's another day and... well, nothing's changed. I'm still grumpy. People still suck.

Hmmm, it's getting late, I've been up all day and anything I could possibly write will be marred by my inability to form coherent thoughts, but here I go.
I feel like venting today. Why is it that some people CAN"T reply to my emails, even quick, nice little how you doing ones? Is it the burden of writing? Pressing the keys a little too much work for precious fingers? Of course not, so I've come to the only possible explanation my parnoid brain can come up with... people hate me. There, I said it. People hate me. I said it again.
Now I recognize that the danger of posting this message here is that the wrong people might read this, think I'm talking about them, and barge me with a slew of unnecessary, (and let's face it) unwanted emails. So let's clear this up right now. If you're reading this and THINK I'm talking about you and feel a tinge of remorse deep within your soul, you're not the kind of heartless fiend capable of truly hating me.That you had feelings at all disquailifies you from the I-HATE_MIKE Club. Relax, I'm not talking about you. I know you're busy. You email when you can and I'm grateful. It's the person who gets an email from me and couldn't be bothered opening it for three or four days. Respond? Only if they need information. Wouldn't want to go around encouraging him.
What makes these people truly heartless is the ability to stirke up a perfectly civil, engaging conversation at the exact SECOND I decide that they're no longer worth my time. It's like a preternatural sense: "I'm losing this one. Better talk to him to string him along." And then the whole vicious cycle starts over again. Thinking that it must have just been me, and that they don't hate me, I continue trying to maintain a relationship only to be ignored again. Oh, life, you crazy roller coaster ride. Can't you just jump the track and send us all hurdling to our deaths?
Have a sunshiny day.
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr............

A rather somber Monday Mission. Remember folks, I don't make up the questions.

1. Although I was told before hand by my mother, my Grandfather finally told me he has cancer and it was speculated he has about 12 months to live. Has someone you know ever told you they had a terminal illness? What was it like for you when you found out. How did that change your relationship with them?

No. Though my grandmother had a stroke, eventually slipped into a coma, and all in all lasted about 5 months. Our relationship changed, well, because she died. It was a little one sided after that.

2. The concept of having 12 months comes as somewhat of a shock. Often those estimates are wrong and a person lives much longer. But still, it makes me think. If you found out you had 12 months to live, what would you do with that time? How would it change the way you live? Or would it?

I would spurn fruit like it was a rabid dog.

3. My Grandfather has decided to undergo chemotherapy. He was told it would not cure him, but it could prolong his life, however his quality of life could diminish. Having watched my father go through all that to no avail, I am not so sure I would choose that option. If you were (or are) in a situation where chemotherapy might cure you, or might not, would endure the usual side effects and discomfort?

Oh heck ya. Plug me in, pump me full of drugs and turn on the freakin' television. I ain't going anywhere.

4. How is your health? How are you doing?

Well, I have a little sniffle... oh shut up.

5. Speaking of health, I was in a Health Food Store Saturday and learned about something called "Ear Candling." It
involves having a helper insert a cone-shaped candle in your ear, lighting it and having the reverse pressure suck the wax out of your ear. Apparently it is very popular. Do you use, or have you ever tried, any alternative heath remedies or procedures? How did that work out? Anything out there we should try (or avoid)?

You want me to stick a candle in my ear? Bite me. I don't like taking any medicine. I don't trust anyone.

6. Which reminds me, this week at work they are giving flu shots for $15. I hate getting shots, so getting one by choice, and paying for it, is tough for me. How do you feel about Flu shots. Do they give them where you live? Are you going to get one or take your chances?

These are stupid questions. People who are "at risk" get flu shots for free. I don't like needles.

7. I'd like to see either "Spirited Away" or "Bowling for Columbine" before they vanish from the multiplex at the mall. But I will probably have to go see it alone (which I hate). Do you like to go to see flicks at the movie theater alone? Or would you rather have company? Seen any good (or bad) movies lately?

I like seeing movies alone. No problem there, but I used to feel weird about it. Then i looked around at the kind of people other people went with. You can always tell who's there because someone else didn't want to be alone. It's not worth it.

BONUS: Don't you want somebody to love?

Shut up.

Watched the Royal Tenenbaums again yesterday. Is there a more perfect comedy? I'm not sure. Obviously Rushmore is a close second. But in an era of "show your bum" comedy, a film that makes you think and laugh is a rare treat.

I'm often asked about television and what shows I like. While I do possess a near encyclopedic knowledge of television from the late 70s to the late 90s, very little has grabbed my attention of late. While there are several shows I like, thers' nothing I schedule my life around. Even the Simpsons, once the best show on TV, has become stale. This week's season opener was the same duller, celebrity filled nonsense we've seen time and time again. If famous people are going to do voices, why don't they be characters?

1. Have you ever had to appear in court? What was the reason? How did it turn out?
No.

2. Ever been accused of something you never did? Were you able to convince anyone?
I would think everyone has at some point in their lives. Sometimes i can convince people, sometimes I can't. Que sera sera.

3. When it comes to crime and punishment, do you agree with the saying "An eye for an eye?"
Depends on whether it's my eye. No, it don't.

4. Are you a judgemental person? Do you ever make up your mind about a person before you know them? When was the last time that happened? Or if not, how do you keep from being judgemental?
Yes. It happened yesterday. I was right.

5. When I was in 6th grade I lit a match in class accidentally and was given the choice of having my folks called or getting 10 "swats." I took swats and damn, that wooden paddle with the holes drilled in it hurt like hell (not to mention the horible whistling sound it made before impact). I don't think they allow "swats" anymore. Ever get "swats" at school? How do you feel about children being spanked in school. Is it best that they don't do that anymore? How about parents spanking kids? Good or bad?

How do you "accidently" lite a match in class? They should have hit you AND called your folks. Never been subjected to swats, but I was threatened with it in Grade one. Back then teachers couldn't hit you but the vice Principal or Principal could in extreme circumstances. A friend and I had chased some girl and made her cry and where called to the VP's office under the threat of a good paddling.
Spanking's fine - it's the attitude of the parents administering the spanking where the problem lies. I think we've all seen the mother/father who loses it in pulic and just starts wailing on their kid. That's abuse, cause they're not in control. There's nothing in the behaviour of the adult that lets the child know "if I do something bad, I'll be punished" All the children of these people get is the message "if Mom/Dad get mad, I'm going to get hit." My parents spanked me, but they always (or almost always) waited until they were calm enough to administer appropiate spankings. We talked about the spankings as punishment for doing wrong - not getting them p.o'd. Though I never bought the line "this is going to hurt me more than it hurts you."


6. What is your favorite "Chick Flick?"
First, you need to define the term "chick flick." To many guys that applies to any film without explosions or blood shed- which ae most of the films I like. If chick flick mean plot over action, Casablanca. If chick flick means female protagnists, then You Can Count on Me.

7. Describe the last situation you were in that can best be summed up by the phrase "seemed like a good idea at the time?"
Errrr... life in general seems best summed up that way.

BONUS: Who will bury us when we die?
Gravdiggers, stupid.

Today's Comment Question: What's your favorite saying (currently)?
What's the dealio?

I finally finished Yi Yi yesterday. What an incredible film! It's film like this that makes me furious with the North American movie system. Such a simple film, simple stories about the lives of a Chinese family - no explosions, no slapsticky humour. Why can't films like this be made in North America? Because the audience wants to see Adam Sandler fall on his backside? Because we enjoy watching the same movie over and over and over with different actors? Because we're too stupid to appreciate art? I don't think so.

Alright. While my wife and her brother went to see Bowling for Columbine last night, I stayed home and watched several episodes of Fawlty Towers. We got the DVD set a couple of weeks ago and I put the first episode in a few days after it arrived. To be honest, I wasn't thrilled. Maybe it was my mood, maybe it was the episode, but I wasn't in to it. Now, don't get me worng, I love Fawlty Towers, have for many years. I haven't watched them in a while, but I don't think that had anything to do with my disappointment.
Last night I found myself completely entrawled with the show. I laughed out loud (which I'm sure the neighbours loved) many times and kept coming up with excuses to put off work so that I could keep watching. It was absolutely magical. John Cleese plays tightly wound better than anyone else alive. To watch him get worked up and up and up, to the point of breaking is truly a thing of beauty, And then when he lets fly - forget about it. When I first saw FT I don't think I appreciated how carefully crafted each episode is, how several plots weave in and out, rapid fire delivery, and how the whole show revolves around one final scene - be it the Germans or the Major's recalling Basil did give him the money. The genius of the show is the path the plot takes to that final scene. So often in comedies today the final scene is obvious, but so is the path to that scene. With Fawlty Towers the trip's an adventure.

Oh dear Lord! Not another survey! Oh the humanity!!!!

1. How many TVs do you have in your home?

One.

2. On average, how much TV do you watch in a week?

Far too many. It's the Who's the Boss hours you never get back.

3. Do you feel that television is bad for young children?

Yep.

4. What TV shows do you absolutely HAVE to watch, and if you miss them, you're heartbroken?

There aren't any right now. Used to be Dawson's Creek, but it's stupid now. Maybe Friends or Scrubs, but I'm hardly passionate about them.

5. If you had the power to create your own television network, what would your line-up look like?

Monkeys in little hats. Lots of interesting comedy shows - MST3k reruns, Mr Show, Kids in the Hall, Monty Python, Fawlty Towers, Blackadders; lots of hard to find classic and foreign movies; No eveyone loves Raymond, no Home improvement reruns no crap!

See, I found a friend's new blog and had to steal all the questionarres.

1. Have you ever felt like you were expected to set a good example for others?

Yes. Whenever I'm out with "youth" or around kids.


2. What keeps you on the right path? For example, why do you think you turned out the way you did as opposed to the nut ball sniper out there?

Fear.

3. Sometimes things seem different than they really are. When was the last time you believed something to be one way only to learn you had it all wrong?

You want me to pick just one example of this? Forget it. Happens all the time. Ask my wife.

4. Can you recall a time when being alert and observant kept you safe?

Not today.

5. Who in your personal circle of relationships do you think is smarter than you?

Who isn't

Are they smarter in just one area, or overall?

They're smarter all over me.

How do you feel about that?

Mmmaaa. Happens all the time.

How do they interact with you?

Pats on the head, bribes of candy, the usual.

6. Let's daydream a little: Describe in detail the most perfect lazy day, start to finish.

Wake up whenever, watch TV (and there be good stuff on), eat something, watch a movie, read a little, nap, repeat.

7. Are you dressing up for Halloween?

Who's asking? Yes


What is the most favorite costume you ever had?

I was Robin. It was a wicked costume but my Mom made me wear a snowsuit underneath it. Robin NEVER wore a snowsuit underneath his costume.


Today's Comment Question: What gives you the creeps?

Brittany Spears little sister... Ladies and gentlemen, the future of skank.

More stupid insights into Mike (maybe this is why my world isn't exciting)

1. What's the most expensive meal you've ever eaten? What was the occasion? Was it worth it?

The Old Prune in Stratford Ontario. It's a bad sign when there are no prices beside the food. Three people: $245. Ouch.

2. What do you like to do when nobody is looking?

Smile... but only when people aren't looking.

3. What's your special purpose?

For what? What kind of stupid question is this?

4. Do you like Autumn? If so, why? If not, tell me about your favorite season.

Not a bad season. Far too short here in Manitoba. Here fall is the week between summer and winter.


5. Ever recommended a movie to someone only to have them hate it? Which movie? Did you feel uncomfortable about that?

All the freakin' time. Often I think things that you have to think about and most people just want to see stuff blow up. Though anyone has loved Pootie Tang!

6. I've had hay fever all day! Sniffles, sneezing, I tell ya, it's awful! Do you have any allergies? Anything that just gets you down for the count?

No. Take your snot and go home!!!

7. Do you like mixed drinks? What is your favorite? As long as we're here how about you order me something too? Just "suprise me!"

I'm really not a big drinker anymore. If you're buying, I'll have rum and Coke (though could it be Diet Coke?)

1. If you could only choose 1 cd to ever listen to again, what would it be?


New Skin For The Old Ceremony

2. If you could only choose 2 movies to watch ever again, what would they be?

Casablanca and Human Condition - the one I love, the other I haven't had time to watch

3. If you could only choose 3 books to read ever again, what would they be?

The Complete Poems of John Donne; Divine Comedy; High Fidelity

4. If you could only choose 4 things to eat or drink ever again, what would they be?

Spagetti, Diet Pepsi, Peanut Butter, Bread

5. If you could only choose 5 people to ever be/talk/associate/whatever with ever again, who would they be?

Oh yeah right. Those I leave off eill be as upset as those I choose. Fat chance, buddy.

I've started writing again, though I only ever seem to rewrite the same four or five chapters. Still, it's writing, and just think, in ten years, I'll have a killer opening to an unfinished book.

No complaining today (sorry for excreting my bile all over this site, but, hey, it's my site)

Movie stuff!!!

Watched The Devil's Backbone, the acclaimed Spanish film from the director of the not-so-acclaimed Blade 2. I learned along time ago that we shouldn't judge a foreign director by his first few English language films. Did not John Woo direct a Van Damme film? Actually all Woo's English films suck (yes, even Face Off), so he's a bad example. Anyway, I digress. DB is a tightly knit little thriller/drama set at an orphanage/school in Revolutionary Spain. Not only does the orphanage have its share of dirty little secrets, it also has a ghost, "the one who sighs." Not giving too much away, the ghost wants to avenge himself on his killer.
What I particularly liked about this film is that it avoids the traps of modern Hollywood ghost stories of pushing the special effects down our throats. The effects of this film (with the notable exception of the ghost's skeleton being visible when he walks) are kept to a minimum. There aren't large computer generated figures, a la House of Haunted Hill or the Haunting. The terror comes more from atmosphere and implication.
To characterize this film as a horror film, though is to do it a grave disservice. Sure, the ghost is important, but the story is about so much more. In fact, this is likely why many people might find it too boring. There isn't enough terror and too much plot for most diehard horror fans.

this post has been removed cause I didn't like it anymore

Saw Eric Rohmer's Pauline at the Beach yesterday, which I really enjoyed. Rohmer has a knack for creating interesting characters and engaging dialogue that makes the lack of plot virtually unnoticable. While the beautiful Marion rattles on incessantly about love, her quiet 15 year old cousin, Pauline, maintains the calm centre of the film. Though her cousin is the object of male desire and the focus of male attention, Rohmer keeps Pauline in the viewer's mind by placing her in frame when men talk to Marion. While Marion and the men are still, Pauline, ignored by the characters but not by the viewer, continues to walk around, catching our eye.Indeed, it is Pauline who proves to be the more interesting of the two. Marion's deluted views of love are continually undermined by her choice of lovers. She believes Henri to be as in lover with her as she is with him, with little evidence to support that. Pauline, on the other hand, chastizes the "adults" for their stupid games - games she refuses to play.
While Pauline remains at the centre of the film's attention, the viewer's most ready ally seems to be Sylvian, Pauline's boyfriend. Recognizing Marion's beauty, he prefers Pauline. Like the viewer, Sylvian inadvertantly gets caught up in the game of the adult lovers- even to the point of being set up as cheating on Pauline to save Henri from being caught with another woman. When Pauline confronts Sylvian about this, he shrugs and tells her there was nothing he could say. Like the viewer, Sylvian is dumb - unable to tell Marion about her poor choice, unable to stand up for ourselves; silently complacent in the crime.

Alright, Canadian Thanksgiving. Whoopee. I'm NOT spending the day alone today, which, given my state of mind, is likely a good thing. Being home, my mind turns over events and situations probably best left unanalysed - why is [name withheld] acting like this? Is he/she mad at me? I thought we were friends? What did I do? - the usual paranoid delusions. What else are hoildays for?

Speaking of paranoid delusions, I saw N. Roeg's Don't Look Back last night. Creepy little film that builds to an intense climax. Aside from one rather graphic sex scene (and much more of Donald Sutherland than I ever wanted to see), I'm not sure about the tag "erotic thriller." Indeed, the sex scene seems a little out of place. While it certainly symbolsizes Julie Chirstie's character's imporved state of mind, and is interestingly shot (cutting between sex and getting dressed afterwards), the scene frankly goes a little long. Which, I fear, might be the typical viewers respoonse to the film as a whole. While talk of psychic powers and warnings from beyond the grave are mentioned, they don't drive the plot forward. In fact, the figure in the red coat is sparingly seen. This might be disappointing. I, on the otherhand, felt that by turning down the intensity early on in the film, the climax becomes more chilling because it truly sneaks up on you. I can say with some certainty that when Donald Sutherland approaches the figure in the red coat I was as scared as I have ever been - truly frightening.

I also continued my ongoing Preston Sturges fest with Hail the Conquering Hero. With many faces and some similiar elements from Miracle of Morgan's Creek (Eddie Bracken as a hapless boob whose major anxiety is his inability to enlist for WW2), HCH is an excellent companion film, but not equl to, MMC. I found this films paricularly interesting after haivng studied the war poetry of Rosenberg, Sassoon, and Owen. With so many men being killed and killing, how can one be sinlged out as a hero - for, truly what is "heroic" about modern warfare? Sturges' film acts as a mild criticism of the American hero-wroshiping tendencies, to incapsulate an event in a few human faces. As I said, this criticism is mild, nevering at the expense of the comedy, but runs throughout the picture.

I have a few more films waiting to be watched over the next several days (I'm taking full advantage of having the place to myself), but turkey calls. A fine, wonderful family has invited me over. I must make myself presentable.

Okay, the world's just not exciting today. In fact, life kinda sucks. Had a rotten day on Wednesday - yelled at my class for being unresponsive - and I just can't shake this funk of depression. Weird. Haven't felt this way since highschool. Have found myself listening the Radiohead's High and Dry over and over again, which I haven't been able to do since a friend in university ruined that song for my by singning it incessantly!
On the plus side, I get to spend the holidays alone. My wife and brother-in-law are taking the eighties road show to Regina to visit their parents. I have committments in the city until Sunday and to drive out Sunday and turn around and come back Monday would kill me. To be honest, good riddance to the holiday. Maybe I'll just buy a pumpkin pie (the best thing about Thanksgiving anyway), order a pizza, curl up on the couch with a blanket and watch reruns of Golden Girls and Who's the Boss.
My film watching has been as eventful as my life. Started watching Dr. Strangelove but only got about half way through it when I was interupted and had to turn it off. I was reallly enjoying it and was completely amazed that I hadn't seen it before. I thought I had. It's one of those films that's just in the culture so purvasively. I starting watching and about ten minuntes in I realized I had no idea what was going to happen. Sure, I know the visuals (Slim Pickens riding the bomb) some jokes ("Gentlemen, you can;t fight in here. This is the War Room"), but the plot is completely fresh to me. I was actually excited when I realized this.
I've also been watching the Granada TV series The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, with Jeremy Brett. I got the complete first series on DVD and have watched the episodes in order. A remarkable series, these shows set the cliches about Holmes aside (the brown checked deerstalker and the large curved pipe) and treat the stories with dignity and respect - as much as I like Basil Rathbone as Sherlock Holmes, his films, particularly the depiction of Waston, is hardly respectful to the source. I also have a number of episodes from the other series (Return, Casebook, Memoirs) on tape from about 8 years ago and have been watching them. Especially now, with Max Headroom's version of Holmes airing every few weeks (complete the costume and an upper-class twit accent), it's good to go back to Brett and see the true complexities of the character.
Enough... be gone.

My choices today: survey or work... Guess which one I decided to do.


NAME: Michael Boyce

SEX: Male

NICKNAMES: Shakespeare.

HOME: do I have one? yes

HEIGHT: 5'10"

AGE: 27

EYES: yep

FAVORITE RELATIVE: What kind of fights are you trying to start with this question?

WHAT DO YOU REMEMBER MOST ABOUT 1999?: The year I moved to Winnipeg

DO YOU SMOKE: nope.

FAVORITE TV SHOW: Simpsons are getting tired, so I'll say Scrubs

WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSEPAD: my mouse?

ONE PILLOW OR TWO: Two one to sleep on, the other to cuddle - shut up!

PIERCINGS OR TATTOOS: Like I'm willingly gonna let someone stick a needle in me when I'm not sick

WHO IS THE SILLIEST/CRAZIEST PERSON YOU KNOW? hmmm...I don't know

FAVORITE DRINK: Diet Pepsi

FAVORITE SOUND: a guitar gently weeping

FAVORITE SMELL: Clothes fresh from the dryer

FAVORITE HOLIDAY: Christmas. My birthday (okay so it's not an official holiday but it sometimes falls on Victoria Day)

FAVORITE CHRISTMAS CAROL: Good King Wencelas and Fairytale of NewYork by the Pogues-cause they have nothing really to do with Christmas other than the attitudes of the seasons.

WORSE FEELING IN THE WORLD: rock climbing harness. ouch!

BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD: the moment between sleep and awake

FAVORITE THING TO DO ON THE WEEKENDS: watch movies, sleep

FAVORITE TOWN TO CHILL IN: Waterloo

FAVORITE THING TO DO ON A PLANE: not die

WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN 10 YEARS: too creepy to even think about

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF IN THE MORNING?: Do I have to get up?

HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE? one or two

ARE YOU A GOOD FRIEND: I don't think I'm the person to answer this. Ask my friends

FAVORITE FOOD: pasta

WHEN YOU MEET A PERSON OF THE OPPOSITE SEX WHAT DO YOU NOTICE FIRST: Smile

HAVE YOU EVER GONE SKINNY DIPPING? no. though I did have a bathing suit that turned out to be almost see-thru, Does that count?

WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED: dust bunnies and stuff

DO YOU GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS:Pretty well

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CONVICTED OF A CRIME: convicted? No.

CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA: chocolate

THUNDERSTORMS~LIKE OR DISLIKE: dislike

CROUTONS OR BACON BITS: bacon bits - croutons are just dry bits of bread; gross

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE: No

IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON, DEAD OR ALIVE WHO WOULD IT BE: Shakespeare.

FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGE: Guiness

IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR, WHAT WOULD IT BE? black but it would look stupid

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE: Yeah I guess

ARE YOU STILL IN LOVE: see above

WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM?: posters,

IS THE GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL? too small...

FAVORITE MOVIES: Casablanca, Lady Eve, Royal Tenenbaums

FAVORITE SONGS: Across the Universe, Death is Not the End (Nick Cave's version)

FAVORITE MUPPET: Rolf, the original Muppet!

MOVIE THAT MAKES YOU CRY: anything with Adam Sandler (boo);

RIGHTY/LEFTY: I am right handed.

DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS: fingers? What are the "right" keys, keyboard Nazi!!!

BEATLES OR ELVIS: who's Elvis?

FAVORITE NUMBER: don't have one

WHAT IS YOUR DREAM CAR: one with a driver

WHAT IS YOUR DREAM TRUCK: do I look like a red neck?

WHO IS/WAS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET CRUSH: the girl with the prettiest eyes

BESIDES SOMEONE IN YOUR IMMEDIATE FAMILY, WHO HAS HAD THE MOST IMPACT ON YOUR LIFE: my professors

FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH: wrestling. and if you laugh, I'll piledrive you

DO YOU BELIEVE IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT: Nope and nothing you can say will convince me. Infatuation at first sight, yes. Love, no way.

EVER BEEN CHEATED ON: Yep. Grrrrr

EVER CHEATED ON SOMEONE: Nope.

DUMPER OR DUMPEE: I thinkI've always been the dumpee. Once I wanted to be the dumper, but was worried about how my friends would react (my girlfriend was a close friend's sister) so I stuck it out until she broke up with me. Lame.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN EVIL: sure and I can tell you where her office is on campus

EVER BEEN IN A FIST FIGHT? Not since I was a kid. Apparently I didn't do it well.

In my neverending quest to provide the world with useless information, here's a Monday Mission.... And all the people said, "Amen."

1. Do you have a favorite piece of poetry or prose written by someone else? Care to share it?

Poetry: "I'm a Jam Tart" W.H Auden
"My way is to begin with the beginning" Byron
Prose: "Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth." Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, A Study in Scarlett

2. In High School, did you enjoy creative writing? Do you currently do any other writing in addition to your Blog?

I loved creating writing in highschool - short stories, plays, novels. Didn't keep a word of it though. I do try to write outside of this blog, but finding time can be a challenge. I've recently completed a play, a screenplay and have been working on a novel off and on for the past two years.

3. Have you ever noticed that the Blog entries you least expect to get the most comments do, and those you expect to generate a lot of feedback don't? Which Blog entry of yours surprised you by getting a lot of comments? Which one did you think would generate a lot but didn't?

I don't get comments. I doubt if anyone reads this.

4. Sometimes you get a chance to make a lifestyle change that has a huge impact on the course your life takes. That is, a moment where something became very clear to you, and that realization changed your life, such as: the need to leave a relationship, to stop an addiction, to bond with someone, to start a new career, and so on. Have you ever had an "awakening" moment in your life?

No. I'm not a big believer in epiphanies. We often realize something profound, but rarely does this have an earthshaking impact upon our lives. To effect real change requires constant work.

5. Then there are other times where you can have a huge impact on someone else's life. You suggest they see a doctor, stop them from taking that last drink, or maybe just say some kind words at the moment. Have you made a lasting positive impact on the life of someone else?

I certainly hope not. I shutter to think I might have that kind of power.

6. Are there any charities or organizations which you support? How did you come to be involved with them?

Not really. I have helped out with Winnipeg Harvest and other organizations, but there isn't a number of them that I help on a regular biases.

7. Care to collaborate with me? Help me out and write the rest of this poem:

I drifted though a dream last night,
visions full of colors bright.
My thoughts began to drift to you,
and in an instant we were two.
I touched your hand,
We began to blend,
Filled with a feeling
that should have no end.

But it did, I hate you.
And I stole your credit card.


BONUS: Hey cutie, what's up with this attitude?

Why don't you step a little closer and ask that?

Yesterday was Tuesday. I like Tuesdays for the simple fact that I don't have to go to school and I have the house to myself from about 11:30am on. I can watch movies I enjoy, instead of trying to sit through some childish flick that has little to no emotional connection with me.
Being alone, I threw on The Miracle of Morgan's Creek, yet another film by one of the funniest filmmakers of all time, Preston Sturges. While The Lady Eve might well be Sturges best film (and my personal favourite comedy), Morgan's Creek is a close second. With razor sharp dialogue, incredibly talented physical actors, and the undercurrents of blasphemy and risque subject matyer, Sturges constructs a tightly wound plot about the spontenous marriage of Trudy Kockenlocker (how did Sturges get this name by the censors?) to an unnamed G.I. After a farewell party for the boys, Trudy returns home with a curtian ring on her finger and the faint recollection of a wedding. Soon after, Trudy discovers that she's pregnant! Facing disgracement she attempts to marry Norville Jones, a local banker who's been in love with Trudy since they were kids. Realizing that Norville really does love her, and that she truly loves him, Trudy can't agree to the match - "It's bigamy!" Without the marriage certificate from the first wedding, Trudy can't have that union annulled, so she and Norville get married with him posing as the first husband. When he accidently signs his real name in the register, he's arrested for impersonating an officier, contributing to the moral deliquiency of a minor and a slew of other charges. He escapes (relucantly) and Trudy and her family move from town to avoid disgrace (remember, this is the 40s). When Trudy does have the children (yes, children), the whole marriage issue is resolved with a gubernially gesture. Hilarious!

As I've commented before about Sturges' films, what makes Morgan's Creek shine is the cast of secondary characters - Trudy's sister, the town lawyer, the banker. Far and away the best of these characters is William Demarest as Trudy's single, putupon father. With physical comedy equal to Eddie Bracken's, a rough, loud demeanor, Demarest is perfect and, unlike in other Sturges films, properly utilized.